Mary Kay Beckman, 50, wasgoed just looking for love but she brought huis more than she’d bargained for. After just a few dates with Wade Ridley, she wasgoed smitten, yet she had no idea that his intention wasgoed to smite hier. Ridley had no prior criminal record. There wasgoed nothing particularly suspicious about him and yet what began spil an eight-day hurricane romance has become a $Ten million lawsuit that Beckman is waging against Match.com.
On Jan. 21st, 2012, after she realized that it wasgoed not a match with Ridley and had called it quits on their short-lived fling, Beckman allegedly came huis to find Ridley te hier garage harboring a knife and the intent to kill. Beckman narrowly escaped the attack with numerous stab wounds and brain verwonding due to several kicks to the head. Ridley’s next ex-girlfriend wasgoed not so fortunate. One month straks, he allegedly broke into the apartment of Anne Simenson, 62, and murdered hier much ter the same manner he had attempted with Beckman.
Even after thesis horrific practices, however, I maintain that online dating is not inherently more dangerous than meeting someone ter a buffet or through another anonymous avenue. Beckman deems Match.com to be culpable for hier misfortune because the online dating giant does not advertise the risks of online dating and, “lulls women into a false sense of security.” Hier lawyer said, “Match does nothing to ensure the safety of its people, but you pay $30, you think you’re getting some type of protection.”
No one should have to go through the terror that Beckman experienced, and yet I take tremendous punt with hier lawyer’s statement. The correlation inbetween paying for access to potential dates and security is an unrealistic expectation. If she paid $30 for drinks at a drankbuffet and went huis with a murderer would the establishment also be responsible for hier fate? If she bumped into a remarkable stranger te a museum should the cost of admission give hier an indication about the quality of the people there?
Wij are well aware that all you need is an email address to open an account on most online dating sites. How many of us have 2nd, third, and even phantom free email accounts at our disposition? So where’s the security ter that?
Not only did I meet my spouse online, but I’ve also helped numerous singles become part of a duo online. There is risk te online dating but there is also risk te crossing the street, driving your car, and even te staying indoors with the windows shut (what if there is an earthquake or hurricane?) You are responsible for your own security online and ter life. If you have any apprehension about online dating after hearing Beckman’s story, I opoffering you thesis basic tips that may help protect yourself from a similar fate:
1. Trust your gut. If something tells you that this fellow or doll is not right, don’t 2nd guess it. Our animal instincts prevail ter dating, so if your antennae go up when you’re with someone, beware. Guys are more likely to assume that they are safe but keep te mind that sociopathic behavior knows no gender.
Two. Always meet them there. Until you get to know and trust someone you meet online, it’s always a good idea to meet your date ter a public place. Do not let them pick you up or know the precies location of your huis. There wasgoed one man that I met online before my spouse who I never became comfy with. Even after a month of watching him, spil wonderful spil he wasgoed, every time he asked mij to come to his place, my gut said no. I never found out if he had nefarious intentions before calling it quits, but I am glad that I erred on the side of caution.
Trio. Phone a friend. Make sure at least one person knows the name and phone number of the person you’re meeting and where you’ll be with them. Say you’ll text them when you get huis. If you do not do so or if they can’t make voeling with you, instruct them that the next call should be to the date location and then the police. The chances of something happening are remote but I recommend having a backup project just te case.
Four. Do Your Research. Always Google and Facebook check your date before going out. You’re looking for any inconsistencies inbetween what they said ter their profile and what your search turns up. If they have no online identity at all, that can also be a crimson flag that something is amiss. Michael Fertik of Reputation.com recommends that, before meeting, you talk to your date on the phone and test them a little them on what they voorwaarde to be an experienced te, “Ask yourself if the person online looks and feels like the one you’re talking to,” Fertik says.
Online dating can be a terrific instrument for expanding your social circle and dating options. You should always keep your guard up te dating, regardless of the avenue through which you’re meeting dates. Beckman’s story makes headlines because it is so unusual, the worst that most online daters encounter is stale conversation or a date that is Ten lbs. stronger than expected. If you remain cautious and oplettend you can improve your chances of letting the right one te.